Another Night...

Of chit chatting with my sweetie... I'll call him that, cuz he's the only one I really talk to lately, and because he is sweet as hell. We both were tired as hell last nite, and he didn't want to fall asleep on me. I asked him questions for a while, the book I have - 4,000 Questions To Get To Know Anybody and Everybody.... So I asked him questions from there, and regular questions, and I believe we talked about two hours.
I should of been doing homework, well reading Chapter 6 for my Macroeconomics class, but I didn't.... but I will be doing that probably tommorrow nite. I do have to prioritize, but he's the thing that makes me the most happy lately. I have many other guys that I usually talk to, but since I've started talking to him on the phone, I barely contact them. I'm supposed to meet CJR, on Sunday, but I'm not sure I want to. I'm sure he's a good guy, just I know what he has to offer, is not what I'm looking for.
But....
I'm not really sure what AJ's intentions are either.... I know he likes me, and thinks I'm cute, but... I'm not sure what kind of feelings he has for me. I know my feelings are too intense, and I need to keep them in check. I actually miss him, thru the day, and wish I could just call and say hi. When I think that though, I feel like I'm being obsessive, and that he will get sick of me, and at some point, not talk to me again.
I'm stupid, I im'd CG yesterday, when I was being bored, and was im'ing alot of people I know... and he im'd back, complainin about his life, and then saying he wasn't with anyone. He was supposed to be with me, but he ignored me for like 3 days, and I said that I'm not putting up with that shit. Fuck him. I was in love with him, but after all the shit that happened over that weekend, I just wish he'd go fuck himself. I still love him, and always will, but I could never be with him, and I surely don't want to build a life with him. I don't need that type of person in my life, he's a criminal, a liar, a cheater, a sneak, a former drug addict, & I don't think he's a very good parent. My opinions yes.... but, this is my angryness showing thru.
I deserve a good man, that has goals and dreams, and wants to make those dreams reality. I want a handsome sexy man, with nice teeth, that will love me, and take care of me, just like I'll take care of him. One day I will find it, until then, I'll just move ahead, and strive for my goals, & work on what I need to work on, to get ahead in life.