Sucks

Life,
Work... (though I'm not there now)
My street,
The snow a bit, but its amusing....
especially seeing people that can't drive in it..

MEN...
The guy I went out on.. like 2 dates with, and hung out with 2 more times, likes me.. seems to adore me, but says there is no "spark", its ok.. I know I'm not up for a relationship right now... all I want is for some nice, sexy, sweet smelling man to come to my house at nite, and kiss me and hold me..

Is that too much to ask for? I have plenty of guy friends that would love to do that, but.. I'd then just be leading them on.

I have so much I want to say... lots of stuff about T., but I'm still too angry yet. I think about him daily, though I know, that this is all for the best, I just wonder.. if he really means what he says, or if he just does this, because he thinks its best for me if he's out of my life...

Either way.. I'm moving on... I've been trying, it makes it easier.. knowing he won't ever call me again. It makes me sad though too.

Heard a joke site.. tonite.. something about.. You kicked my dog.. reminded me of Paul.. it's sad.. I can picture us all sitting in his car hanging out.. and less than a year after that.. he's dead...at 25 I missed him then, I miss him now, and he was more Wil's friend than mine, but he was always nice to me... always...

I feel stupid for talking to Wil about him, I'm sure it makes him more sad than me... I sit here with tears crying over him... I don't know if more for me... or more for him... or more for his family.....